KAIUS

The long wait is over! I have given birth to a healthy baby boy!

I went to see my OB in her lying in clinic two days prior - I just wanted to see the clinic and also wanted to have an IE. That was when we learned that my cervix is already 3cm dilated and I should be on my way to delivery in the next two weeks. She prescribed dilation tablets and also checked on my BP which I was so worried about - thankfully it was normal. The next day, we went to the mall and bought some last minute baby items for Kai as I felt that we were so close to giving birth already and I would not have time to buy things if I didn't do it sooner.

The trip to the mall was OK, we maintained physical distance from other shoppers and followed protocol in and out of the vicinity. The mall we went to did not have their AC on so we were sweltering while roaming the non-lit areas. We just went to the baby section to buy some additional wipes, diaper bag, bottle cleaners, and some items that we weren't able to buy online. I felt sore and exhausted when we got home so I just laid in bed and replied to work emails afterwards. 

At around 1:30AM of May 20th, I felt the need to pee so I got up and went to the wash room. I thought it was just normal to have some excretion but it felt different that's why I woke my husband up and told him we might have to go to the hospital. Then we decided against the hospital around 2AM since the contractions I felt were getting stronger and closer to each other so I told him it might be better if we go to the lying in clinic as it was near our place and inform my OB that we are going there (in case she's at home or at the hospital). 

It was a good call that I didn't go back to sleep so we were able to go to the clinic around 3AM. Good thing my OB was there too, she just delivered a baby before we arrived. I felt so relieved that she was there and that I was attended sooner. I was at 4cm when we arrived and all contractions were already active labor. They wheeled me to the Delivery Room and had me practice pushing there until around 6AM. When they did another IE on me, I was 6cm already and were just waiting for 7cm so we can start pushing. The contractions were painful, but the pushing and getting the baby out was more painful - actually the most physically painful thing I have experienced. I remember my OB and the attendants were coaching me to push whenever I feel contractions - it was like pooping a really big chunk that was stuck inside hahahaha! 

At 7:21AM, I gave birth to Kaius. What a relief! My OB was shocked to learn that the baby had gotten bigger! Kai was only 2.5kg last 9th of May when we had the ultrasound and she (OB) instructed me to eat more so we can have the baby's weight at around 2.8kg before due date. Kaius weighed 3.5kg to our surprise and I was also amazed that my body was able to handle pushing him out via normal delivery. Props to my OB and the attendants too! 

It has been twelve days since then: my wound is healing, I am on my way to recovery I guess, but I feel all sorts of aches and pain in my body: my wrists are aching and are swollen, my back feels like it will snap with just one wrong move, I haven't had a decent sleep, I am exhausted - but all these are wiped away when I see Kaius smile and look at me adoringly. I know that he cannot see just yet, but I like to believe he sees me.

One other struggle that I have now is on producing milk for him. I still don't have my breast milk so we are giving him formula milk. As much as I want to breastfeed, I can't and my body won't cooperate. The first week I had a leak on my left boob but that was it - it never occured again even if I ingest moringa or moringa supplements. It's a pain to see Kai not getting the vitamins he should be getting through my breastmilk, but it's more painful to see him go hungry so what choice do I have, right? I just have to work on my milk supply now so we can hopefully breastfeed soon.